Happy #115: Ask different questions.

2012/13 New Year's Eve fireworks.
Downtown Salt Lake City, UT

About a month ago my friend LaDawn gave me a priceless little treasure. She discovered a book titled the Great Little Book of Afformations, by Dr. Noah St. John, and shared it with me as a gift.

It's changed the way I think.

The basic concept is that most of the questions we ask ourselves in our quiet moments are negative. The brain, naturally wired to find solutions, manifests the answers we are seeking--positive or negative. In his book, Dr. St. John suggests the positive change we often seek is sabotaged by the negative questions we ask ourselves. He offers a simple solution. Change the questions.

Understanding that outcome follows action and action follows thought, this new concept intrigued me.

So I began experimenting.

One of my negative and disempowering questions (for a good many years) was, "WHY am I still ALONE?!?!?"

It was simple to turn this one around, finding limitless ways to reframe this positively. One of my reframes was "Why am I surrounded by people who love and support me?"

New Year's Eve I decided to take my son downtown for the EVE celebration and fireworks. Personally, given what I've been through lately, I would have been content to stay in the warmth and comfort of my home and cut out pictures from magazines for my 2013 vision board. Crackling fire, cheese, crackers, grapes, bubbly, movies... That's how I would have celebrated had I been by myself. It was COLD outside!!

But I wanted my son to have the experience of fireworks on New Year's Eve. He's been with his dad for the celebration most years and they always stayed home.

So, I dressed up. Short sequin dress, hose, 3/4 length fur coat, fur hat, and cowboy boots. Not the most likely combination, but trust me. It looked good. And I was warm and I felt good. Which is all that really matters.

Downtown we went. A few minutes before midnight, I was given a tip by one of the event staff and we located ourselves  right beneath the spot where the fireworks would be going off. Best view possible. Feeling the bitter chill, I pulled my coat in tightly around myself and prepared to be amazed. :)  Right about then Keaton announces he's going to go check something out and he'll be right back. Then he leaves.

Any guesses what happens next?

Yeah. Countdown begins and the sky starts to light up like the fourth of July. Incredible. I look out into the midnight darkness beyond. The big, round moon is shining brightly in the distance and the most incredible burst of fireworks I have ever seen is cracking and blazing right before my eyes. And I'm standing there, alone.

No Keaton. Feeling suddenly self-conscious, I look around. People are gathered together, everyone in awe, lovers kissing the passionate wet kiss of a New Year's Eve, others clapping and cheering. And I'm alone.

I felt sad. :( And awkward...

Then my reframe question pops into my mind. "Why am I surrounded by people who love and support me?"

I looked again at the people all around me. This time, at their faces. They were smiling. So I smiled back. And I felt my heart lift. I may have been standing by myself, but I wasn't alone. I was surrounded by people who, in those first few minutes of a brand new year, were loving and supporting me.

Possibly just because I looked so good. ;) Lol. But whatever it takes. :)

Within seconds I saw the experience differently. Because I had asked a different question about my life. A positive question.

Happy #115 is Ask different questions. Reframe your thinking for love, faith, and hope.

Because perspective is everything.

Warmly and with the love that lets you know you're not alone,
Kathleen
xoxo